My grandfather used to tell a story of his boyhood about a time he accidentally burned a brushpe that contained poison ivy. The smoke and oil got all over his and his allergic reaction was so bad that even his eyes swelled shut. He was so inflamed head to toe that anything touching his skin made him miserable. He spent several days sitting bare naked on a wooden rocking chair while he recovered.

My mom has a similar story about rolling down a hill through a patch of poison ivy and getting a rash up in her little girl lady bits. My cousin Nate basically looks at a poison ivy plant and has to go to an emergency room for a steroid shot. I’ve seen his skin blister up so fast he looks like he’s catching a zombie plague. Considering my family history, it’s surprising that I’m one of the 25% of the people in the world that’s not particularly reactive to poison ivy.  As a kid and a teenager it took me years to figure this out. I’d walk through the same creek sides or woods my brother or friends did without suffering the itchy consequences. 

It’s not a super power obviously, but it’s one more nice little gift the universe gave me to make my life that much more Kevin proof. The only time it really came in handy was when I was working at the outdoor learning center, and we played a big game of hide and seek with some scouts. I literally laid down in a 20 foot patch of poison ivy. When one of the kids found me, I was able to monologue at  him like a supervillain. I pointed out all the plants around me, and told him to look at the leaves,  and told him that I was immune. He thought I was bluffing, and I dared him to find out the hard way. He walked away, and I “survived“ another few minutes before somebody else caught me.

Unfortunately, like most people, I took this gift for granted, and science tells us that over time, with enough exposure, everyone becomes sensitive to the chemicals in poison ivy. Somewhere in my late 20s or early 30s, probably because I’m the kind of idiot who occasionally laid down in fields of poison ivy, I got sensitive to it as well. Now I’m a Muggle like the rest of you.